Structured approach to workplace conflicts, performance discussions, and challenging feedback using preparation-delivery-followup framework. Use when preparing for tough conversations, addressing conflicts, giving critical feedback, or navigating sensitive workplace discussions.
A structured framework for approaching challenging workplace conversations including conflicts, performance issues, sensitive feedback, and emotionally charged discussions.
When to Use This Skill
Preparing for a challenging conversation with a colleague
Addressing performance issues with a team member
Delivering difficult feedback to a peer or manager
feedback-mastery skill - SBI feedback model (overlaps but more feedback-focused)
professional-effective-communication skill - General communication patterns
Example Scenarios
Scenario 1: Addressing Missed Deadlines
**Issue:** Team member missed 3 deadlines in past month
**Impact:** Project delayed, others blocked
**Goal:** Understand root cause, agree on prevention plan
**Opening:** "I wanted to check in about the recent deliverables. I've noticed
the last three have come in past deadline, and I'd like to understand what's
happening and how we can address it together."
Scenario 2: Peer Conflict
**Issue:** Colleague publicly criticized your work in meeting
**Impact:** Embarrassed, trust damaged
**Goal:** Address behavior, rebuild working relationship
**Opening:** "I'd like to talk about what happened in yesterday's standup.
When you said my code 'missed obvious issues,' I felt called out in front
of the team. I'd like to understand your concerns and find a better way
to handle code quality feedback."
Scenario 3: Asking Manager for Raise
**Issue:** Feel underpaid relative to market/contribution
**Impact:** Demotivation, considering leaving
**Goal:** Discuss compensation, get timeline or adjustment
**Opening:** "I'd like to discuss my compensation. I've been here two years,
taken on the payments project leadership, and want to make sure my salary
reflects my contributions and the current market."
Anti-Patterns to Avoid
In Preparation
Scripting every word - You'll sound robotic; prepare themes, not scripts
Building a case - This isn't a trial; seek understanding, not winning
Waiting too long - Issues compound; address promptly
In Delivery
Starting with "You always..." - Triggers defensiveness immediately
Burying the lead - Get to the point; don't soften excessively
Asking leading questions - "Don't you think..." isn't asking
In Followup
Forgetting to check in - Without follow-up, nothing changes
Holding grudges - Issue resolved means relationship continues
Over-documenting - Not everything needs written record
